I am sleeping with my housemate. This was a bad idea, but I am very attracted to him | Leading questions

Due to a combination of shyness, insecurity and finding intimacy painful, I am far less experienced when it comes to relationships than my age (early 30s) would suggest. I have only had one serious, long-term relationship. A few months after it ended, I started a casual relationship with one of my housemates. I knew from the start that this was a bad idea, but I was (still am) very attracted to him.

It has felt like a “real” relationship at times, however, he can also be very immature. After being “casual” but seeing nobody but me for almost a year, he has recently had an encounter that left me feeling rejected, jealous and hurt, especially since I could hear everything. I made my feelings clear and he was very apologetic.

He asked me if I could see myself continuing to sleep with him if he started seeing other people. I really am not OK with this. I know the logical thing is to stop sleeping with him, but I am not sure I will be able to resist the temptation. I know I need…

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This article was written by Eleanor Gordon-Smith and originally published on www.theguardian.com